It Never Ends...

I learned something the other day...that, what I have, will never end. I am trying so hard to not be the NightFly...to fit into the DayWorld. And I'm just not sure I'm ever gonna be able to do it. I have a Twit or a Tweet or a Twitter or a Tweeter or a Twieter or a Twater or something like that and people are actually following me. Following what I do!

Let's have a look at that...who gives a crap what I do from moment to moment...when I shave, when I shower, when I watch TV, when I go to bed, when I do whatever I do...who gives a hairy rats...?

I am trying SO HARD to be a DayWorld person, even though I mostly work the night shift. I just don't want to isolate to the night. I don't want to miss the sunrise...but the sunset suits me just a little better.

I am The NightFly and always will be.

What I have, what I am, what I will be, what is yet to come...

Will never change.

And never end.

I see that same hooded face,

It beckons me from the gate

"Did you not know, my friend?

Ten years ago was the end?"

"After the war,
Waterloo was no more...
But your ticket states,
there is one train,
it's leaving now,
There is a place,
Remember my face,
And Waterloo"

it's nice work if you can get it...now, who the hell said it...

I am ...

Sometimes, we don't really understand the consequences of our actions.

Sometimes, we wish for things that will never happen.

Sometimes, we will do what we have to in order to get what we want.

Sometimes, we love people who are so far away from us (both in proximity and how they feel about us), that we are alone.

Sometimes, we feel alone.

Sometimes, we wish we were...

We all would like the best for ourselves...and our children and our grandchildren. Well, I don't have any children...I have STEP-children and I try so hard to take care of them.

I have a wife...and I try too hard to take care of her, especially when she calls me names like "idiot", "drunk", "fool".

I can accede to each of those monikers at one time or another but there are other names, too...

"Caretaker", "Butler", "Confidant", "Friend".

Sometimes (oh, there's that word again), sometimes, I would just like to be called "friend". It that so much to ask?

And so I say a "Wonderful Night" to anyone who reads this post,

Good Night, Friend.

Sometimes The Night Can Bring Light to You...

Sometimes, a picture of a couple of old friends can make you see the light...

Even if you haven't spoken to those friends in a very long time, even if, at one time in your life you loved them very much, even if they are gone...they can still make you see the light.

I used to go to concerts with these guys and I used to drink too much when I did...BUT, we all did. We all drank to much! I just didn't stop when the party was over. They could, I couldn't.

As a result, I don't speak to these guys anymore. I don't speak to the entire "gang" that used to go to these concerts. And I don't do to these concerts (or for that matter any concerts at all) anymore.

It hurts when you lose friends, family...through attrition (an ugly f***ing word), through death, through movement, through...

But it hurts worse when you lose them through your own stupid behavior, your diseases, your idiocy, well, Fly, let's say it...your dumbass drunkeness.

And I miss them all. I can only hope that, one day, they will come back. But I seriously doubt it. What I have done and said and been, well, sometimes, can't be removed. Just like grafitti on a wall, it's always there and can't be painted over.

I am ashamed. I am humbled.

And that is my first step toward making amends to these people that I love

And who I believe once loved me.

Tonight, I am a humble nightfly,

and I remain ever yours...

Take Me Home...

Take that look of worry,
I'm an ordinary man
They don't tell me nothing
So I find out all I can

There's a fire that's been burning
Right outside my door
I can't see, but I feel it
And it helps to keep me warm...

So, I don't mind.

Seems so long I've been waiting
Still don't know what for
There's no point in escaping
I don't worry any more

I CAN'T COME OUT TO FIND YOU
I DON'T LIKE TO GO OUTSIDE
THEY CAN TURN OFF MY FEELINGS
LIKE THEY'RE TURNING OFF THE LIGHTS

No, I don't mind...

Just Take, Take Me Home.
Because I don't remember.

Cuz, I've been a prisoner all my life,
And I can say to you,

I have no far horizons
And I wish upon a star
They don't think that I listen
Oh, but I know who they are...

No, I don't mind.

But, please...
Take Me Home.

Sometimes...

And I know I say that often, BUT!

Sometimes,

You have to make a change...you have to "change it up", you have to move on.

Is this my time?